My sweet little boys. You have been on my mind so much lately. My heart is rejoicing over the hopes of finally getting to bring a baby home, but at the same time, it makes my heart yearn even more for the things that we missed not having you. I am watching the moving Tangled. In it, the King and Queen realize lanterns each year on the birthday of the missing princess. The artists in the movie depicted such sadness on the King's face, that this time, it really hit me. My heart is still sad. It still yearns so much for you. I know it always will, even through the happy things in life. The lanterns that they lit, reminded me of the balloons we release on you birthday. I realized in the movie, they were morning the 18 years she had been gone and I realized how hard those special birthdays would be. The days when we realize that you should have started school, you should have been baptised, you should have started driving and then graduating, and serving missions, etc. I just miss you both so much. I know its a stupid movie, but it really hit me this time (even though I have watched it a million times). It makes me so very grateful for eternal families!!! And now we have a new reason to be grateful for families. You both are going to be big brothers. Everything in this adoption has truly fallen into place as it is supposed to. I am sure that our little guardian angels up there (you) are helping to move the pieces into place. I am so grateful for the gift you were and are in my life, but I miss you so much! Help me to be strong. Help me to be a good mother. I miss you so much and I love you so much!
Always in my heart.
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